[ On a scale of one to ten on the weird scale, this is a solid 6. The wiggly hair with eyes gives him a few extra points, but that really just makes him a possible Medusa. Hardly too bizarre.
Still, the shouting is hardly a surprise, and Ford simply lifts his hand in a wave when he hears it. ]
Greetings! This must be your first trip through dimensions.
[There's quite a lot going on in his head. Why does he not recognize where he is, where did his followers go since they were just with him in the portal, why is his body like this, and why does it feel like something is wrong with his magic.]
[There is also, you know, the events that just happened, but how about we shove that down into a deep dark little box where he can't think about it. There is someone talking to him, and his first knee-jerk response is to accuse witch because he has not known anyone else to hold a form like this but witches.]
[But this man does not look like a witch to him. His knowledge of witches, while not complete is still far greater than anyone else's, and he feels mostly??? confident that this is true. Oh. That is something else that has become very clear to him suddenly. He does not have access to all the fucking knowledge of everything anymore. His head is. Very quiet.]
[Ford has been given the single most bewildered owlish expression for the solid like silent thirty seconds he's been stared at by this weird clown man.]
--Yes! [And like a toy that's button has been pressed, he springs to life, dragging himself gracelessly to his feet.] Yes, it would appear I'm suddenly very far from home!
[This is an easy part to play. It will get him somewhere he hopes.]
Please forgive me just now, I must have been in terrible shock. Might you tell me what's going on?
[ Honestly, witch is a more accurate description for Ford than Shadow Milk might conclude. He has not brought any cookies alive for the sole purpose of eating them, but... well, it's not like his moral compass is that much more robust.
He's helpful, at least. He waits patiently while Shadow Milk processes things; Ford easily occupies himself wondering if his many-eyed hairstyle is physiological, magical, or just some sort of accessory. And when Shadow Milk finally has a question for him, Ford has a prompt answer. ]
Like you said, you're a long way from home. This is the Grove. I'm afraid I don't know its dimensional designation, but—
[ He waves a hand, dismissive. It doesn't really matter until they leave. ]
In any case, you're stuck here indefinitely. You might meet a few other people from your home dimension, or none at all. Some very strange things will happen while you're here, and you should avoid the forest as much as you can.
[ Let's see... ]
Oh. And all of us are supposedly reincarnations of individuals that lived here hundreds of years ago, so you might find perfect strangers strangely familiar.
[Hahahaha, wow, there sure is a lot to process here while Shadow Milk is trying to maintain a veneer of pleasantness to this gnat that is explaining things to him. His smile stays, one of rapt attention but-]
[His hair begins to writhe, making it even harder for Ford to probably discern the nature of it. It splits apart like tentacles, while black inkiness seems to drip upwards while the eyes look. Particularly unhappy. There is a strange thickness to the air around them for a moment before it just ...peters out. His hair simmers down to just looking kind of bewildered, eyes blinking. Shadow Milk continues to hold that saccharine expression on his face.]
Since you've been so kind as to explain so much, [He tests the ground with his feet, tapping the toe of his shoe a few times before he simply rises in the air to float comfortably.] I don't suppose you would mind taking me to whatever counts as civilization? I would be so ever in your debt. I'm but a humble jester, and if this forest is as frightening as you imply, it sounds like we should proooobably leave!
[ Oh, that is fascinating. Ford carries on steadily with his explanation, but while he does a hand vanishes into his coat only to reemerge with a thick, leather-bound journal. When Shadow Milk simply levitates himself into the air, Ford's expression goes from curious to delighted. ]
Certainly! We're not too far from the inn. But along the way—
[ His hand vanishes into his coat again, and this time it emerges with a pen. ]
[Anyway, he raises an eyebrow as the journal comes out. Hmm. Well it will make things less boring on the way! Let's see what kind of questions he has. He floats along after him like a tool.]
Ooooh, an interview with yours truly? I suppose! What do you have for little ol' me?
[ Ford is already not the greatest at detecting when he's being lied to. Add in the huge variety of extremely bizarre things he's seen in his life and you've got a perfect recipe for someone who can't tell when he's being fucked with. ]
They are.
[ Eyes, huh...? Well, that's easy enough to move on from. ]
So the shampoo—did you make it yourself, or is that a commonly available product in your dimension?
Oh, of course! Magic is prevalent aaaaall around Earthbread! You'd be shocked to know what kind of tomfoolery they get up to in those magic academies. Toiling away with their little cauldrons, playing with the natural order, and what have you, heheh.
[His hair shifts, and all the eyes close? they open up and become stars and moons for a moment, before shifting into ...candy shapes? Anyway, this guy seems really gullible so that's fun.]
arrival
Still, the shouting is hardly a surprise, and Ford simply lifts his hand in a wave when he hears it. ]
Greetings! This must be your first trip through dimensions.
no subject
[There is also, you know, the events that just happened, but how about we shove that down into a deep dark little box where he can't think about it. There is someone talking to him, and his first knee-jerk response is to accuse witch because he has not known anyone else to hold a form like this but witches.]
[But this man does not look like a witch to him. His knowledge of witches, while not complete is still far greater than anyone else's, and he feels mostly??? confident that this is true. Oh. That is something else that has become very clear to him suddenly. He does not have access to all the fucking knowledge of everything anymore. His head is. Very quiet.]
[Ford has been given the single most bewildered owlish expression for the solid like silent thirty seconds he's been stared at by this weird clown man.]
--Yes! [And like a toy that's button has been pressed, he springs to life, dragging himself gracelessly to his feet.] Yes, it would appear I'm suddenly very far from home!
[This is an easy part to play. It will get him somewhere he hopes.]
Please forgive me just now, I must have been in terrible shock. Might you tell me what's going on?
no subject
He's helpful, at least. He waits patiently while Shadow Milk processes things; Ford easily occupies himself wondering if his many-eyed hairstyle is physiological, magical, or just some sort of accessory. And when Shadow Milk finally has a question for him, Ford has a prompt answer. ]
Like you said, you're a long way from home. This is the Grove. I'm afraid I don't know its dimensional designation, but—
[ He waves a hand, dismissive. It doesn't really matter until they leave. ]
In any case, you're stuck here indefinitely. You might meet a few other people from your home dimension, or none at all. Some very strange things will happen while you're here, and you should avoid the forest as much as you can.
[ Let's see... ]
Oh. And all of us are supposedly reincarnations of individuals that lived here hundreds of years ago, so you might find perfect strangers strangely familiar.
no subject
[His hair begins to writhe, making it even harder for Ford to probably discern the nature of it. It splits apart like tentacles, while black inkiness seems to drip upwards while the eyes look. Particularly unhappy. There is a strange thickness to the air around them for a moment before it just ...peters out. His hair simmers down to just looking kind of bewildered, eyes blinking. Shadow Milk continues to hold that saccharine expression on his face.]
Since you've been so kind as to explain so much, [He tests the ground with his feet, tapping the toe of his shoe a few times before he simply rises in the air to float comfortably.] I don't suppose you would mind taking me to whatever counts as civilization? I would be so ever in your debt. I'm but a humble jester, and if this forest is as frightening as you imply, it sounds like we should proooobably leave!
no subject
Certainly! We're not too far from the inn. But along the way—
[ His hand vanishes into his coat again, and this time it emerges with a pen. ]
Do you mind if I ask you some questions?
no subject
[Anyway, he raises an eyebrow as the journal comes out. Hmm. Well it will make things less boring on the way! Let's see what kind of questions he has. He floats along after him like a tool.]
Ooooh, an interview with yours truly? I suppose! What do you have for little ol' me?
no subject
[ Ford points to Shadow Milk's hair as they walk. ]
Those eyes in your... hair? Are they physiological—that is, a part of your body—or are they some sort of magical or technological addition?
no subject
[He's fucking lying, and he was always intending to lie, but lets see what happens when he says this. Maybe it will be amusing.]
Are they looking at you now?
[They are.]
no subject
They are.
[ Eyes, huh...? Well, that's easy enough to move on from. ]
So the shampoo—did you make it yourself, or is that a commonly available product in your dimension?
no subject
[His hair shifts, and all the eyes close? they open up and become stars and moons for a moment, before shifting into ...candy shapes? Anyway, this guy seems really gullible so that's fun.]
Wanna see a magic trick?