Netbook, backdated to while everyone was struggling to stay awake--

[chickenchoicejudy]

hey guys how's it going it's ryan~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

so I got in an argument with ❤️✨S O M E B O D Y✨❤️ and I was hoping you guys could back me up here, because he's totally wrong they - anonymous person - are TOTALLY wrong.

[This is literally the least anonymous he could be without calling out Min-Gi by name.]

anyway the question of the day is--

[Hang on, he draws in some drums for a drumroll-- 🥁]

--coffee can't like actually KILL you right? like if you have too much of it? because I've had SO MUCH in the last few days and NOTHING is happening so either it doesn't or ours is broken or something I don't know. but a person can't drink enough caffiend to like die, right? Right?????

thanks you guys are great I hate being awake peace out ✌️

Comments

[outofsynth]

[Waiving his anonymity because this is so obviously ridiculous.]

You mean CAFFEINE?

Yes. It can. The only reason you don't think it makes any difference is because you're already so wired anyway.

[chickenchoicejudy]

[It's okay because Ryan tried to keep him anonymous and now Min can't criticize him for it!]

But I should be like SO MUCH more wired dude!!! This is just like NORMAL wired i should be vibrating into fucking outer space by now.

[chickenchoicejudy]

DUDE LEAVE MY SPELLING OUT OF THIS

[outofsynth]

I'm just trying to help.

[He is not and they both know it.]

Maybe you don't feel wired, but you are. Your heart is going to be so messed up if you keep going.

[chickenchoicejudy]

You're totally not you just want to be right

[HE KNOWS MIN'S SMUGNESS WHEN HE SEES IT]

You could come feel my heartbeat for yourself if you're so worried about it~ ❤️

[outofsynth]

That's not true. I care about you and want to help you.

[And, you know, the opportunity for smugness...]

That's okay. I've seen how much coffee you had. I'm actually surprised I can't feel it from here.

[alchemization]

High dosages of caffeine can absolutely kill you, yes. Most adults can have about 400mg of caffeine a day. A cup of coffee contains 95mg on average; espresso has 64mg. Assuming you were having straight black coffee, you could have roughly 4 cups of coffee per day and be largely fine. I'm operating under the assumption you aren't adding any caffeine pills or otherwise to it.

If, however, you were to consume past this, you'd have caffeine overdose symptoms. Mild symptoms usually include jitters/tremors, anxiety, and upset stomachs. Higher dosages can cause tachycardia (increased heartrate), muscle twitching, and vomiting.

If you were to keep going, you could have seizures, irregular heartbeat, and further cardiovascular complications leading to death. You would see this typically around 1000mg a day. If you've had 8-10 cups, stop drinking before you actually kill yourself.




I have a much better solution than caffeine to keep yourself awake anyway.

[outofsynth]

Thank you! I don't know why this is so hard for him to understand.

[alchemization]

It's a common misconception that "caffeine immunity" means you just need to drink more of it to have it affect you, but caffeine is technically a drug and the body has ways of developing immunities to said drugs if they're taken continually en masse. That said, the side effects can still present themselves even without the "benefits".

In layman's terms: If it doesn't work the first time, stop taking it before it kills you the fifteenth. In case he lost the ability to read in whatever coffee-addled haze he's in, you can relay this to him.

[chickenchoicejudy]

Dude!!! I can still READ!

cw: drugs

[chickenchoicejudy]

[That is so many numbers. You expect him to do math in these conditions? He is not doing math. Fuck math.

But he will scribble for a moment, the magic notebook equivalent of [ryan is typing...] ]

cocaine???

[alchemization]

Better. I've been working on a drug that keeps you awake for at least seven days. Clinical trials are ongoing. I need more participants.

I could also remove that pesky organ responsible for processing the caffeine before it affects you. It would be useful in alchemy.

[ANAXAGORAS.]

[chickenchoicejudy]

there's totally an option where I keep my organs...right......?

[SUS.]

[lyricistdontmiss]

Oh boy okay Ryan buddy two things

1. I think!!! maybe you should calm down on the coffee because yes it can be SUPER bad for you and also like you need to drink some water

2. you might want to sit down for this but like well you might want to sit down anyway considering the sheer amount of coffee intake HOWEVER have you like heard of ADHD or actually they might call it ADD back in your time idk

[chickenchoicejudy]

ugh that sucks though like okay maybe I'm a LITTLE twitchy but it's not even doing anything otherwise. I figured more would be better but ugh I just feel. i dunno. more focused...? I guess?

I'm totally drinking water though Min won't let me not drink water but I AM. Besides like coffee HAS water in it, like you make it with water so...I'm good!

[The last bullet point gets a pause though. By the time anyone was really diagnosing it, Ryan wasn't a kid anymore, so it doesn't sound familiar. ...Or, well. it kind of sounds familiar but not for the right reasons--]

ACDC?

[outofsynth]

She's talking about Attention Deficit Disorder. It's kind of a new thing. Unless like all of your siblings have it you're fine.

[chickenchoicejudy]

oh. i mean if it's kind new I wouldn't know if they do?

[But also he doesn't know what it entails, so. oh well!]

[electricego]

too much coffee can kill you. with your fleshy human body you're probably going to give yourself heart problems.

[chickenchoicejudy]

good thing my heart is awesome then! just like the rest of me!

[electricego]

you're willing to take that risk? would be an awful shame if you keeled over and gave the forest free pickings.

[chickenchoicejudy]

i'm young and healthy my heart won't explode

but also like, people are dropping dead by falling asleep so REALLY this is me trying NOT to give the forest anything! :)

Because this totally won't make things worse or anything

[backyelley]

not drinking decaf are you?

[chickenchoicejudy]

dude no way all caf or nothing

...buuuut maybe people would stop yelling at me about it if I switched to decaf?

[backyelley]

looks like the caf is the dangerous part yeah?

[He also did not know this until now. Learning!]

Have at.

[chickenchoicejudy]

Yeah I guess so but don't tell my boyfriend or he's going be be like "see??? I told you so" for like EVER

Thanks man cheers to coffee that won't make me die!