sticksandbones | If we're strong for once this could get contagious

[Look, sometimes your family spends January having a crisis every other minute and you just sort of forget to make a sacrifice to the winter gods. Why do they even need
a sacrifice anyway?! It's winter! It's supposed to just go away after a while!

Needless to say, Stan's wound up with a pretty nasty cold. He hasn't been sick since the last time he died in Deerington, and he's just as insufferable now as he was then. He's atrociously bad at letting other people take care of him when he actually needs it. If anything he's worse, since he can't feel the full body chills or warmth of fever. Wooziness takes him by surprise a lot and sure he feels like a truck him him, but he's fine, really!

You'll catch him in one of two places - either sneaking to the kitchen to get snacks he shouldn't be trying to eat when he's supposed to be resting, or up in his room being forced to actually lay down and rest, even though he could definitely walk this off if he wanted to. He's fine! He's just...comfy here, that's all!]

[Frankly if his grunkles are sick then maybe nothing crazy will have to happen this month. Dipper, who wound up being ground zero of whatever the fuck was happening last month, is exhausted, but at least he isn't sick.]

[Not physically anyway.]

[So, as the only one who made a sacrifice he has been on duty. That mostly means he's the one keeping an eye on Stan and make sure he doesn't eat an entire jar of jam with a spoon while he thinks his back is turned.]

Ahem.

[Stan startles! Then slowly...slowly...turns around...

...with a spoon in his mouth, holding an entire jar of jam.

The silence is deafening, and pretty damning honestly. Stan can't take it for long though.]

What?! Can't a guy ea--

[Hang on, he has to take the spoon out of his mouth and cough up a lung for a second. Once he's done though he stubbornly goes for another scoop, staring Dipper directly in the face while he does.]

You're eating like pure sugar! That's not going to help you get better!

[Did you forget that Dipper is a tyrant when looking after you, Stan. Time to remember!! And Mabel isn't here to sneak him ice cream this time. You are at his mercy.]

And what are you doing out of bed!

You already said it! I'm outta bed eating pure sugar!

[His voice sounds hoarse but somehow, despite that, he still manages to not have an indoor voice.]

Look, it's boring laying around in bed all day just 'cause I've got a liiiittle karmic punishment of a cold. It's just...

[--He spaces for a second, feeling like his brain is swimming all of a sudden. But then it passes and he shakes his head.]

--it's a trip to the fridge, I'm not out jogging a mile!

[Dipper lets out the most dramatic, drawn out sigh Stan has ever heard.]

At least let me make you something a little more substantial if you're gonna sneak around behind my back.

[He does pause to think a little, and then something occurs to him. This is much harder this time because their level of technology here is a lot different unless the specifically change it. So-]

Also, if you want, I can go talk to either Ydalir or Heimr about getting our hands on a TV so you can watch something instead of just sitting here bored.

Fine, fine...

[And with that he sits down at the table - definitely because Dipper's going to feed him and not because he feels woozy at all.]

Wait. Really? You'd get me a TV?

[It's less that they could have a TV here and more that after Stan's been the most stubborn jerk of a patient, Dipper's still offering to get him a TV to pass the time with. Something about that strikes a chord, but might be amplified by how miserable he feels at the moment.]

Huh. I keep forgetting we can get those here...

[Good, good. He starts grabbing stuff to make one of Oscar’s famous casseroles.]

Yeah? I mean- I know we got really used to being able to use the Omnis to watch whatever when we wanted so it wouldn’t be fair of me to expect you to just sit in bed and stare at the ceiling.

[He waves a hand like this is no big deal.]

The therapy office has a TV so I don’t see why I can’t get one for the house. I can see if I can get my hands on Ducktective or The Duchess Approves?

Eh, screens were always too small on those things anyway. Nothing beats the real deal.

[Not that it stopped him, obviously, but he knows what he likes and he likes not feeling like a teenager staring at their phone to watch garbage television.]

Great! Love not having to get therapy to watch TV!

[He means it, hell will freeze before he willingly get therapy for himself.]

Ooo, you think Heimr's got the whole box set? Duchess's always good too, a real...[He yawns, despite himself.] A real classic!

[ Well, fantastic news, he's getting body blocked by one whole pink teenager. One who seems to be carrying around a big pot of water?? ]

Mister Uncle. [ She's given up on trying to remember "Stan" apparently. ] You're not supposed to be out of bed. Extra strain on the body can make your illness worse, you know...

[In her defense, there's two old men in this house both named some variation of Stan. It's legitimately a little confusing sometimes.]

What?! Says who? Maybe magic curse colds are different!

[He's going to just keep trying (and failing) to get around her. Let him through!!! The back and forth motion isn't making him dizzy at all!]

I feel as though... even though it's a magic curse, not putting physical strain on your body would defeat the purpose of calling it a "cold".

[ She will not move, Stan! Sorry! You're gonna get taken care of, damn it. ]

Now, come on! I'm gonna make some food and you can even eat it in bed. Which, in my opinion, waaay more fun than at a table.

Hm...it is more fun...

[And fun is always tempting, especially when he's bored out of his mind. This time when he tries to get around her it seems to be less to actually get through and more to get a look at what she's holding like a nosy child.]

What'cha making?

[Gotta decide if this deal is worth it, after all!]

Curry! But if you don't like that, I also have pasta! Aaaand the noodles are shaped like little stars!

[ She'll shoo him inside the room. ] I'll get started on it only if you lay down, though!

[Knock knock :) it's a man you spoke to probably one time in your life or something idk!! Gnosis is here and he ~~would like to speak to you about your car's extended warranty~~ needs to tell you about Dipper's brainghosts—]

[Oh hey, it's...this guy. What's his face from the meetings.

Stan opens the door and raises an eyebrow because this isn't one of the people who usually turns up here (and even then half of them don't even knock anyway). But there's no gun or anything pointed at him, so...]

Uh. Hey...you.

[Nailed it.]

Gnosis Edelweiss-Silverash. From the lab. I know we don't often speak, and normally I'd have no reason to come here. I'll make it quick: I'm concerned about Dipper's mental state with regard to some "extras" hanging around inside his head that I was made privy to. Do you mind if I come in and explain?

[Honestly, Stan appreciates that. Straight and to the alarming point with no bullshit. There's a small shift in Stan's expression, but he doesn't immediately lose his cool.]

Yeah, sure. C'mon in. You want coffee or anything?

[You know, like this is a normal social call.]

Edited 2025-03-08 01:18 (UTC)

I prefer tea, if you have any. If not, I wouldn't worry about it.

[Into the house he goes!]

If there's anywhere in particular you want me to sit, by the way, do point it out to me. [otherwise he'll just stand the whole time and it'll be awkward.]

Table's good. Pretty sure Dipper's got some tea too, hang on.

[Stan heads into the kitchen, but the table he points at is a little poke table set up in their living room. He's only gone a minute though, just long enough to grab supplies and fill a kettle with water.

He comes back with a trivet for the table, a mugs, and a few assorted kinds of herbal tea Dipper's been getting from Cookie house. More stupidly though, Stan's holding...a bizarre kettle with a face. He sits across from Gnosis and holds it in his palms, elbows on the table.

And then, they go up in flames, to heat the tea kettle literally by hand.]

So, what're the extras you're talking about? Is he making deals with demons or something?

[You know. Hypothetically.]

[Fascinating. Gnosis doesn't question this because weirder shit happens on Terra, but he'll be the first to confess it's been a while since he's seen someone warm a tea kettle with their literal hands.

He crosses his legs as he speaks, gesturing with one hand for emphasis while the other rests on his knee.]

I hope not, but perhaps you know better. In short, while we were in that massive tree that grew earlier this month, the Seaborn did something that linked our minds together. While we were working to solve that issue, something else was speaking to him, chastising him for various things.

He acted as though it was something he was trying to hide, and told me to ignore it. I essentially threatened to let you and Ford know, and he got upset as teenagers are wont to do.

[But like, Gnosis is not about to let a kid walk around with BRAINGHOSTS. He will be the uncool adult and tattle.]

Eesh, don't remind me. I got stuck in that stupid brand for a while.

[He's out now though, so! Moving right along! He listens to the tattling, taking it more seriously than one might expect someone like Stan to. But of course Dipper didn't want them to know about it. Stan rolls his eyes.]

Sounds about right. Unfortunately we've got a family history of "making bad deals with demons." He probably assumed he'd be grounded for the rest of his life or something.

[He doesn't have his hands free, but you can practically hear the air quotes when he talks. Fortunately for Dipper he sounds more exasperated than mad - it feels like the whole family can't go a year or two without someone stepping in demons or accidentally letting someone malicious in their head.]

So you could hear it too? The voice or whatever?

[That's not usually how Bill possessions go, so that's probably off the table at least.]

Realistically, not that I'll tell you how to parent him — he just needs to know an adult is on his side. I would have loved to have that as a teenager, personally.

[Try not to ground him! Which, Gnosis does get the impression that isn't the goal, but the statement has been made nonetheless.]

That said, yes, I could hear it while our minds were linked. I'm not sure how to describe the cadence of the voice other than... bordering on sinister, but with a comical edge? Again, it was quite critical of the things Dipper was doing, but not in the way where I thought it was Dipper being self-critical. If I'm right, this appears to be a completely different voice of dissent in his mind.

Pfft. Wouldn't we all?

[He gets a little bit of an eyeroll from Stan, but not any actual disagreement. It's more of a comment on how a lot of parents are pretty shitty.

The silly teapot whistles in his hands, and he pours them both hot water before setting the pot down on the trivet. He gestures at the assorted herbal teas.]

Take whatever you want. Dipper's been getting them from the house with all the Cookie People in it and he's got a ton of them.

[Stan goes for a lemon one, and puts five or six heaping spoonfuls of sugar in it, as though he's attempting to make hot lemonade.]

It sounds like...kind of a scaled-back version of some jerk we've dealt with before? No one worth remembering, but I'm guessing he didn't want me or Ford freaking out at him about it. I'll uh. I'll talk to him though. He should know by know we'd be able to help him with it better than anyone!

[He doesn't sound mad exactly, just baffled.]

[The Town Hall ended with a decent exchange information, but also with a handful of people looking concerningly murderous on his behalf. He does let Mizuki fuss over him for a bit, but once that's done, he waits outside the building for Timekeeper.]

[Honestly, he's interested in what she might think about all this, though he knows her interactions with Pure Vanilla have been ...eh. Lukewarm? She doesn't seem to care for him much, but given both their dispositions, that doesn't entirely surprise him.]

[Anyway, he'd be interested to see how much she knows about a certain blueberry asshole clown.]

[She shows up promptly, of course, riding the Embroider and sliding to a halt next to Dipper.]

I take it you've met with an interesting experience! Shall we discuss at your place, perhaps?

[She pats the length of scissor she's not taking up in invitation - yep, she's offering to fly them back to the Pines house. Knowing that family, it's probably one of the most magically secure places in the whole Grove, and there's a chance that might be necessary, she figures.]

[You know, he hadn't expected that, but he very clearly perks up at the invitation.]

Definitely.

[Time to climb onto the golden scissors, which he does utterly gracelessly. TK don't watch it's fine he knows how to do this. OKAY. There.]

You wanna see some of the trap doors and secret rooms?

Of course! What is a proper building without them?

[She does at least wait until Dipper has himself properly situated before zipping off for his house at a rapid pace - and he may find it surprisingly easy to balance while sitting on this thing. Well, it would be no fun if he fell, so Timekeeper is using her levitation to keep that from happening, too. Enjoy the view of the Grove from the air, because it'll be pretty brief at the speed she's going.]

[HAHA Still a better ride than that time he magnetized himself to the outside of a spaceship while it blasted across the Gravity Falls skyline.]

[This is way more fun and way less terrifying.]

Right? If you're not at risk of falling through the floor when you pull a cord what's even the point?

[Luckily, the trip is brief and Dipper doesn't waste anytime hopping down to let TK inside. Rather than head through the door that lead into the parlor where most of the furniture is, Dipper takes her down the library-esque hall lined with books until they get to the very end.]

[That is when he pulls on a book and the wall swings inward to reveal a little reading nook.]

Or if there is not at least one innocuous object that is secretly a lever that flips an entire wall around? Those are quite tricky to properly engineer, you know!

[And hey, guess what Dipper shows her exactly once they arrive! She looks very pleased by this as they step into the small nook.]

Well well, a classic! And quite necessary, when you wish to read uninterrupted. Ah, I miss using the time rifts for such things...

Wait until you see how you get into the basement.

[There's like four ways to get into a basement of some kind in this house.]

Yeah, I actually really like this little spot. It stays pretty quiet despite how close to the center of the house it is.

[He'll take a seat on one of the chairs, since now is the time to probably talk about the serious stuff.]

So, I'm gonna take a wild guess to say you've more or less figured out what I got up to, yeah?

Edited 2025-02-07 03:41 (UTC)

[Timekeeper makes herself at home in a chair as well, leaning the Embroider against the closest wall and crossing one leg over the other as she sits down.]

If it was Truthless Recluse Cookie's head you poked around in, I can make a rather educated guess at what - or who - you might have found, yes. However, I would hear the actual story before moving forward on assumptions.

[Assumptions and jumped conclusions are not how you properly science, after all.]

If you mean the fact that his psyche's been shattered and there's a representation of some corrupted avatar of knowledge and lies living in his head, then yeah. I met "Shadow Milk".

[Dipper gives the impression of having a migraine just thinking about it. There is also a very discrete moment where he locks eyes with...something just past Timekeeper? He goes very still before he settles and goes back to talking.]

A lot happened, but It started because I- Look, I've dealt with possession a lot in the past, unfortunately. So, when I talked to Truthless I got a lot of bad vibes, and it felt a lot like something could have been possessing him. I decided to take a look and see.

I knew he wouldn't be easy to crack but I really over estimated what a mess it was in there, and just how much I would hate that blue clown-ass son of a bitch.

[Timekeeper does laugh, but it's a little hollow.]

Your instincts for such things are quite sharp! But yes, Shadow Milk Cookie does have quite the habit of making a mess of things - time included.

[She did not miss Dipper staring past her shoulder like a deer in the headlights for a moment, but she does not comment on it. Yet.]

The Beasts are not normally my problem to deal with - they get their due at the proper hands when the timeline lies as it should, after all. Now that things have gone a little off track, however... I do hope the jester - or whatever fragment of him has made it here - knows that I will have no qualms hunting him down should he make the wrong move.

[Her gaze locks directly into Dipper's eyes as she speaks, and there's an almost tangible pressure in the room.]

And the wounds?

Quell surprise.

[Unfortunately, he can completely imagine how annoying that would be, because Dipper knows a shitty entity just like him.]

I have good news at least. I was able to more or less confirm that the Shadow Milk in his head is a result of his psyche being split- or, the result of what happened to him back home. If there is any of the Actual Shadow Milk in there, it's a very small piece.

Which I found out by tricking him into having to admit he didn't know something that extended outside mine or Pure Vanilla's memories. The wounds are because he got so mad about it he tore my face open.

[And he is so smug about this.]

Worth it. Hahaha, sucker.

I can certainly appreciate that! And yes, that makes sense that it should only be a shadow of the true thing. If I could not find this timeline before being pulled here, surely a Beast could not!

...Hm. But of course, you did notice he went for the eyes. I suppose I ought to keep mine on you, then, false little liar or not.

Yeah. I think, he did purposefully leave the eye itself alone, because he was taunting me with a twisted representation of my worst nightmare. [His eyes flick away, then back.] I imagine he wanted to be sure I could watch. Talk about a sore loser.

[He sighs, folding his arms in thought.]

Joking aside, I got really lucky I even got out of there as well off as I did. It was probably an insane thing for me to try and do, given that Pure Vanilla is as old and powerful as he is. White Lily even begged me not to do it but ...I did get the most important thing I could have out of it, so, it was a victory. Just ...a very lucky narrow one.

That does seem to be your specialty, does it not?

[She hums in thought for a moment, leaning back and crossing her arms.]

I will not tell you not to be reckless; that is what makes you so fascinating! With interesting and valuable results, no less. It is quite funny for White Lily, of all people, to tell you not to try the insane for her husband's sake.

[Yes, she's chuckling at that.]

Should such a thing ever not go well for you, however, I will take matters into my own hands. But I think you already know that. As for Truthless Recluse and Pure Vanilla... well, I am not so worried.

You're not wrong.

[Unfortunately getting into shit is practically his middle name. Getting lucky is less so, but he is still standing here so he must be doing something right.]

I can tell you I'll try to provoke eons old manifestations of a god less when I'm on their home turf, I guess. While I'm pretty happy with the results I got, I probably could insulted him less. Maybe.

[Nah. Anyway, here is the crux of what he figured this conversation would lead to. His smile is juuuust a bit fond.]

Yeah, I know. Sadly it's a little harder to get back at this guy where he's at. It's cool. If he ever shows up here for real, I think it would be hilarious if you punched him.

[HE'LL punch him. Get got, idiot.]

...Really? What makes you say that?

Oh, make no mistake, were he to arrive here he very much would attempt to provoke everyone around him! Must it be a punch, however? My scissors would do quite nicely, I think.

[Yeah, nah. Insult him more. It's very funny when people defy Shadow Milk.]

Hmm... that situation should resolve itself in time. There are certain conditions, but I hardly think they are lacking here.

If we're strong for once this could get contagious | OPEN

STAN

Sick days - Early February

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hey we need to talk about dipper //after mizukiquest resolves

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Dipper

For Timekeeper

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