are you really you?

[purevanillacookie]

[The script that appears in the netbooks is new, elegant. A little... scrombly, as if the person writing isn't used to fingers (he is not) but it's legible.]

Greetings, my name is Pure Vanilla Cookie, please forgive me intrusion, but I was told this was the way to reach out to everyone. I have been given some information about this place, though I must admit I am have a difficult time understanding some things, and there is one question I have which I hope others may shed some light on? Has anyone else woken up here in a body not their own, yet with enough similarities to your former body that you can see the resemblance?

[Haha, what.]

Comments

[bloodyopus]

...All of us have our own cross to bear. [ Also in the literal sense of the word for Wolfwood. ]
But I shall not lie to you that I am a sinner and a taker of lives, and as such, I am suffering from my just punishment. Yet...regardless of that, I am thankful to you. For being willing to listen...and for being concerned enough to ask, even though we were still strangers moments ago. Thus, it is not a burden that you ask, although indeed...it is a story better saved for later.

...But I shall keep that in mind. Thank you.

[ What else could he say but that? At the cost of sounding like a broken record. Phantom heaved another sigh.

...The spirits, yes, and the VOICE in his head. Not to mention the vaguely stinging pain on his throat and collarbone area that still flares up from time to time; he only has five Oripathy suppressant medicine with him. How long until the old pains return? Not to mention his chronic insomnia, and the hallucinations. The latter wasn't as constant as it used to, and he found himself more lucid nowadays than the opposite, but he was still on guard, nevertheless.

That was why, that small, cruel voice in the back of his mind piped up, you are nothing but a burden, a good-for-nothing. Worthless piece of trash.

At moments like this, even the VOICE was kind in comparison, its capricious cruelty a reprieve. That smaller voice was...more cruel than any blade could ever hope to be. Phantom flinches, before remembering that he was still in a conversation with Pure Vanilla. ]

...Ah. I happen to be in the inn as well. But...I shall keep this in mind, too.

And this. I would ask you how could I ever repay you, but...I know you would likely tell me that it was not necessary. You...are just like someone I know. Both of you have a warm and gentle presence, like spring...

[purevanillacookie]

[Ah. That explains a lot. Though he's unsure of Phantom's reasons why, the other seems to be repentant over his actions, and his kind words seem to be the course of a man seeking penitence. Thus, to Pure Vanilla, the man is deserving of forgiveness, understanding, and love. He could write that down, but this is not the place, not on a device that airs it out for all to see.

He will wait, instead, for the day they meet and have time to discuss it thoroughly.

Instead he takes a moment to draw smiling face next to Phantom's words, a little ˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶.]

You would be right, repayment is not needed, now or ever. Because it is not something to repay! It is my joy to lend aid to a friend, no matter how that aid may be rendered! To be an ear, a shoulder to lean on, or simply someone to share a drink with!

And I am glad you think so, my friend, it makes me happy to hear those words! Though please, if it ever becomes too much to handle, do not hesitate to ask me to step back. I understand for some it may be overwhelming, or come off as overbearing, and I would not wish you to think that.

[bloodyopus]

[ Chances are, the silly cat didn't realise that everyone in the network could read their conversation should they were so inclined. Then again...it wasn't as if the fact that he used to be an independent assassin and was involved in the Crimson Troupe was a secret, back in Rhodes Island. He'd used the former in order to push others away (it helps being considered insane as well, although he would admit that he was far from the definition of...mentally stable, even to this very day) while the latter...well, it wasn't as if his rescue operation from the old castle was a secret. He still didn't think that he was worth it, and he was still uncertain of The Doctor's reason for throwing their lot with him and risking their neck out for him, but nevertheless, it happened.

And he was, after all, still an assassin. Only The Doctor's this time instead of the Troupe Leader's. A puppet could never outgrow his role nor his mask, but at least this time he was doing it out of choice, his own volition.

It was true, however, that he was penitent. It wasn't as if he wanted to go down this path, leaving a trail of dead bodies behind him. The spirits who haunted him (and who was practically his personal entourage at this point) makes absolute certain that he would never forget — especially not his doomed debut night, a little more than a decade ago. ]

In that case...then how about you consider that as my repayment, dear friend? I mean by accepting your assistance, whether it's the ear that you had so kindly lent to me, your shoulder, or...a drink, should you ever buy me one in the future. [ ... ] I cannot promise you that I could be more joyful, or less...burdened by my past, but I could, at least, help put your heart at ease in return.

...At least, allow me to think of it as my 'repayment' to you. It would be my happiness and honour to do so.

And once again, I thank you. Very much so, Pure Vanilla. I would certainly keep that in mind. I might...not be good with people, and sometimes words fail me, but I shall do my best to do that. If you ever stepped past any boundaries, that is...

In return, please do the same for me, although I'm afraid I am rather...not good at consoling others. I find long silences to be therapeutic, after all. Which...I realise isn't what most usually people wanted...Sometimes I also straight out disappear...

[purevanillacookie]

Ah, my friend, there is no need to ever think you must be more than you can be. All I can wish for is an easing of any aches that may pain you, not to turn you into someone you are not. Yet I will gladly accept this as repayment, for it will indeed ease my heart greatly to know I have helped, even if just a little bit. If only to let you rest easier, with a better peace of mind.

If words fail you, then please do not hesitate to use other means that may be more comfortable for you! I promise I will do my best to understand.

[The doodles, for example, are a great way of conveying the emotions the other may be feeling at the time, without saying them outloud.]

We all find different things to help us the best. If silence is what you find the most helpful, then you shall have it. Silence can be peaceful and bring about a clarity of mind, and sometimes all one needs is a friend beside them to sit in silence with them.

[He has no idea what Phantom looks like, yet, but he can doodle a little sheep and a little cat simply sitting together in repose, some butterflies and flowers around them. Friends.]

[bloodyopus]

...Thank you. I do not suppose those words could account for all the gratitude I felt towards you, even if we were strangers scarcely a moment ago, but I do hope that you could accept this paltry gratitude of mine, too. And of course...I shall keep that in mind. That is most relieving to hear indeed.

[ Perhaps he had been cheerful once, although he's always been more of a quiet, reserved sort of fellow...but it was simply impossible for him to return to the person he used to be. And...the thought of others expecting that from him filled him with anxiety, which is why Pure Vanilla's words reassured him.

...Perhaps he could never become the man he once were, but the future held endless possibilities. The Doctor had taught him that, and now his new friend had reminded him of that. Perhaps, just perhaps...a small hope had planted its roots in Phantom's heart, the heart of the haunted man. ]

I shall keep that in mind, too, then. Likewise, please do not hesitate to do the same. I would say I am better at conveying things through body language, but...in absence of that, this should do. A picture is worth a thousand words, correct?

[ That was his manner of saying that he understood what Pure Vanilla was getting at, and under those words, he drew a small cat licking a small sheep. ]

...You do understand. Though, from what I have gathered, most people preferred the comfort of words, as I have mentioned before. But...even if that was the case, I am glad if someone understood. That puts my heart at ease, too.

[ The doodle is seriously adorable, and touching, besides. He might even be smiling a little when he saw it. He'll add some fluffy-looking clouds in the sky above them, and also some more flowers. Friends. ]

That aside...if you currently need some time to further orient yourself, or to simply settle in and get some proper rest...I understand. After all, this place and everything...is a lot to take in, indeed. I would not wish to impose more on your time, if that is what you need.

[purevanillacookie]

Strangers are simply friends you have yet to introduce yourself to. I accept your thanks with joy that I have been of aid, in any capacity.

And you are quite correct!

[The doodle makes him laugh and he draws the sheep hugging the cat, which merely looks like the sheep flomped on top of the cat with the cat tail sticking out. To join the added flowers and the clouds around the other doodle. Pictures do indeed speak a thousand words.

And he's glad that Phantom understands and feels comfortable enough to accept this. It eases his heart greatly.]

We each have our different methods, and they should all be respected. If silence is what eases you the most, that's how it shall be.

And yes, it is... a lot. It will take me some time to come to terms with my form and the area, and the very idea of this world, but that does not mean I am not open to helping others as well. No matter what they may need. Please, never hesitate to speak to me if you desire it.