[netbook] soups that could make you forgive your father

[eidxiety]

Hiii it's Ain!! I have the flu or something haha. I didn't know I could get sick :O

How do you make soup? It's vegetables in water and then you put it in the oven at 500, right?

Comments

[quirkynote]

This recipe lacks proper protein. If it remains this way, you are going to succumb to your illness and die. Such a tragedy, please make peace with your loved ones and your unsatisfactory oven.

600 is the correct soup baking temperature.

[eidxiety]

[Offscreen he is now anxiously wiggling in the kitchen like OH NO, thanks anxiety rocks for making him worse—]

:( But i'm trying NOT to die of the plague :( :( :(

We need a better oven!!!

[quirkynote]

You will either require a better oven, or you can obtain a second, inferior oven and combine their strength to create something much more powerful.

[If there's one thing A.B.A. is really good at, it's being confidently wrong about...anything.]

You will also need to go out and kill something for proper nourishment. Considering your condition, I suggest something weak, like an ant. Or you could simply ask a neighbor for assistance.



[There's a quick pause before something is quickly scribbled in:]

*to kill for you. It is considered socially unacceptable to eat your neighbors.

[eidxiety]

[This is so stressful!!]

How does an ANT contain proper protein!! It's an ant!!! And how do I combine ovens I didn't go to school for this!! Or at all!!!!

[quirkynote]

Defiant for someone who is on the brink of DEATH! Fool! The ant is to build your strength. You then use the energy you've gained from the ant to kill even larger prey.

Pay attention, it's very simple.
Ant > Snail > Squirrel > Chicken

[eidxiety]

Aren't there creatures easier to eat than ants and snails :/

[quirkynote]

[Just gonna...squint at her book for a second. She immediately believes by "easier to eat" he must mean "easier to kill." Eating is easy??? You just stick it in your mouth?? So???]

...easier than an ant? You must be more ill than you originally let on.


Soup will no longer aid you. Death is intimate.

[........she means "imminent."]

[eidxiety]

Death SUCKS there's nothing intimate about death!

[...he has "died" before. Legally speaking.]

[quirkynote]

[Technically, didn't they all die-]

Yes, I agree, death is quite awful, but it's simply a part of life. You can't have one without the other. I can only hope that your life was filled with plenty of love and laughter...

[Live, laugh, love]

Ain, was it? I'll be sure to mourn you properly.

[eidxiety]

:( When you hold the funeral can you ask everyone to wear light green and eat cheesecake in my honour :(

[quirkynote]

[Oh no... This poor soul is so alone in the world, they need a complete stranger to hold their funeral for them? No wonder they were so hung up on the ant, they didn't have a single person to ask for help. Is there no one to comfort them in their final moments of need? How many people does she have to wrangle to come to a funeral for someone nobody knows?!

No...she has to. They must not be forgotten!!]

Yes, of course! Anything! What sort of cheese do you desire for your cake?

[eidxiety]

[Gonna be real fascinating when Ain realises that he's not dying after the anxiety wears off. But he's also going to be miffed when he realises that people on the internet notebook tell LIES.

Anyway, Ain doesn't know what the hell the cheese in cheesecake is so—]

cheddar :(

[quirkynote]

[But is it really lying if you think you're right-]

A simple, yet understandable choice. Consider it done.

[She doesn't even know where to find cheese, let alone how to make it into a cake.]