Dark Cacao Cookie (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
winterfrosting) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
sticksandbones2024-12-31 05:51 pm
winterfrosting) wrote in sticksandbones2024-12-31 05:51 pm
Entry tags:
New Year, New Cookies
Who: Dark Cacao, Affogato and anyone else in Cookie House willing to brave the blizzard
What: The Sunrise Holiday is here, and already signs aren't good
When: New Years Eve/Day
Where: The Grove
Warnings: Drama, mostly
[Cacao, earlier in the winter, had planned to invite the entire Grove to celebrate his region's most important holiday. But as the cold keeps getting deeper and sharper... no, it was not safe. The household knows his plans to see the new year come in. But he doesn't expect any of them to come out. And if they do not for long.
He's in his full winter gear as he tends a small campfire to hold back the worst of the chill. It's strange, even with it blazing away it barely cuts into the cold at all. And he finds he has to keep feeding it constantly.
It's a bad sign. He doesn't need to be a shaman to know that. He has a notebook out to take note of any signs in the weather or the sun when it arrives. Any strange animals or guests to analyze later. But he knows that will be more Affogato's task then his own. He is here as the King. The Winter Lord. As a sign all on his own.]
I suspect we may not see the sun at all if this snow continues.
What: The Sunrise Holiday is here, and already signs aren't good
When: New Years Eve/Day
Where: The Grove
Warnings: Drama, mostly
[Cacao, earlier in the winter, had planned to invite the entire Grove to celebrate his region's most important holiday. But as the cold keeps getting deeper and sharper... no, it was not safe. The household knows his plans to see the new year come in. But he doesn't expect any of them to come out. And if they do not for long.
He's in his full winter gear as he tends a small campfire to hold back the worst of the chill. It's strange, even with it blazing away it barely cuts into the cold at all. And he finds he has to keep feeding it constantly.
It's a bad sign. He doesn't need to be a shaman to know that. He has a notebook out to take note of any signs in the weather or the sun when it arrives. Any strange animals or guests to analyze later. But he knows that will be more Affogato's task then his own. He is here as the King. The Winter Lord. As a sign all on his own.]
I suspect we may not see the sun at all if this snow continues.
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...he's dense on many things. But after all Affogato has told him, and their time on the beach...]
I am not above jealousy as well. Or greed.
[He turns slightly, just his glowing eyes visible in the dark]
Perhaps it is in a dragon's nature to want everything.
[And he had a dragon's heart long before the King and Queen blessed him]
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Ancient though you are, you are a man. No one is above that allure.
[ He can see those eyes, he can feel the tail tighten on his. Stupid. He was so close to being over him. Then one event, then another, and it all comes toppling over like a tower of melting cake. Why?! Why can't he ever get a molding break! ]
... No one.
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[That quickened breath is just barely there- but he can't tell himself he's imagining it. His tail tightens more, and he raises a hand to lightly touch Affogato's shoulder. Heavy even through the layers]
Prone to those... same weaknesses as anyone else.
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You infuriating-
[ He reaches up to yank his furs down enough to free his head, then surges forward to close that small bit of distance, arms coming up to wrap around Cacao's neck. They're almost the same height, after all, so it's very easy to do.
And when Affogato presses his mouth to Cacao's it's more like a clash than a kiss, hot and angry and desperate. Teeth bite and dig, demanding Cacao submit to him or rise to meet him. ]
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Exactly how his alternate self remembered]
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And don't worry about those chapped lips, the chapstick on his own will soothe them. Parting his lips, he licks a little line along Cacao's, but pulls back before Cacao can retaliate or take the invitation. Not far, just so he can speak. ]
Why do you do this to me...
[ He doesn't sound quite so mad here, because he's not letting go. ]
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But that month at the beach, even if it wasn't 'really' Affogato... it gave him a taste. And he finds he can not wash it out]
You linger, no matter what I do. It should not surprise you that I come back every time.
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Do you want me. Truly want me. Or do you want to only have me on the side, something you can dip in to like ink when you wish to stroke out a new piece of art.
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[A flint in his voice. Never that. No love or lust could do that, though it's clear the tugging is adding to the second in every motion]
He knows our... complicated history and feelings. Told me to follow my heart if it came to it. I decided against it then because I have come to value you deeply. I do not play games.
[he might never know the depth of Affogato's past, but he has intuited enough that he knows he would never happily play whore- not even for a king. And Cacao would not want him to]
I do want you. Have for some time.
[Finally a direct answer]
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And if he comes back, Affogato doesn't know what he will do.
So the words hurt, as much as he wants to hear them. He puts his forehead on Cacao's shoulder and fists his hand into his hair but doesn't tug again. Cacao can't read thoughts, however, so after a moment Affogato speaks up, voice bitter. Slightly choked. Because Gods damn you, Cacao.]
I will not be second place. Do you hear me? I deserve to be someone's... someone's only...
[ He is NOT crying, he is not the type, besides they would freeze on his cheeks, but his voice is miserable. He hates him, he hates him, he hates him. ]
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He will admit to himself that he had hoped. Hoped there could be some balance. That he could want and have. He feels so much love in him now that was frozen before that surely he can supply all Affogato could want even if was shared.
But that wasn't fair and he knows it. Still, he slumps with the realization and loss of it. His stoic shell cracks under it. A deep sigh on the edge of a sob. When his affections were nebulous there was always the delusion of possibility- not any more. Now there's finality and he hates it]
Yes, you do. More than most.
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[ There's pain there that he's trying desperately not to show, because he wants to be fine with the idea. Sure, he can come second. Maybe even third, if what he sees between Lily and Cacao is real. But it bites deep and rips open old wounds, mocks in voices of the past. Unwanted. Unloved. And if someone says otherwise, it's as a consolation prize.
So he focuses on anger instead. Forces it to come. Forces himself to ignore the sob from Cacao, which eats at the edges of his heart. ]
I hate you.
[ Old venom, even if it doesn't have quite the same bite, and Affogato draws away. Unwraps their tails, draws the hood back up. Hides himself. Turns his back so Cacao can't see him reach his hands up to bury them against his face, wipe away ice. ]
I have given you your portends. We will not see the sun this morn. I am returning to my home.
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... thank you for coming, Affogato.
[ his voice raspy. But, no apologies. Because he refuses to apologize for his feelings when they are the truth.]
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Would you give me the same love as the others? Would you treat me equal? Would you invite me into your house, alongside them, despite the pain I caused them?
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Would, for love, he be able to give it a chance? For love, should you not make sacrifices? ]
I do not know. Please, let me think?
[ And he has to speak with Mizuki. ]