[POST-MORTEM] not to blame

[theuniverseleads]

Who: Loop & others
What: Loop doing Loop things
When: October 5th ~ 14th (and probably onward to the end of the month)
Where: Locations™
Warnings: hello depression spiral my old friend.... talk of murder/dead kids, suicidal thoughts, ISAT and GF spoilers, will update if needed!


After everything that happened on the 4th, it's not long before Loop's cozy new camp is also left abandoned. The cozy pillows remain for awhile, perhaps, but Loop is nowhere to be found near it for the rest of the month.

... and they're not at their old tree, either, if anyone decides to check. There's slash marks in the ground, here, and deep in the tree's bark, swathes off willowy branches sheared from the curtain surrounding it. How long has it been like that?

Regardless, they don't plan on being an easy person to find.


((using this as a catch-all instead of attacking like a dozen inboxes maybe, so hit me up BlueFlewFedUQueen/discord/PMs/etc if you want to do something with Loop!!))

Comments

[October 4th] FOR STAN

[theuniverseleads]

[It's late in the evening by the time Loop shows up. They only vaguely knew where Dipper and the grunkles lived, anyway, and it took awhile to decide that's where they were even going...

But! Here they are. Standing outside their boarded-up door like a lamppost. They give it three little knocks.]

[charlastan]

[It's definitely not the worst place to go if Loop's looking to keep a low profile. The Pines live just north of everything else, a little out of the way. Kind of hard to accidentally stumble on anyone out here.

At first no one answers, but no one's answering because Loop's knocking on a boarded up front door. There's a muffled "hang on, hang on--" from inside followed by the most dramatic-sounding groan. Then that's followed by some clicking sounds to their right as Stan undoes the locks, and suddenly Stan's at the side door, leaning a little heavy on the frame but trying to look really casual about it.]

Heh. Long time no see.

[It feels better than immediately addressing...well, everything else.]

[theuniverseleads]

[They don't look especially happy, but they are... slightly less miserable, maybe? Upon seeing the familiar face. They shuffle awkwardly on their feet, not really meeting his eyes. Their voice is quiet when they finally speak, a bit strained.]

... I don't have anywhere to stay. Feels like I'm asking to get killed sleeping outside now.

Can... can I stay here? Just for a little while. I can sleep on the floor, I'll try not to be a bother, I... have nightmares, sometimes, but I'll deal with it, just—

[They don't know where else to go, when anyone could be another copy. And it feels like they still barely know Stan, and he's grieving, and he probably doesn't want to deal with them on top of everything else, but... they don't know who else to trust, besides the one person who believed in them.]

[charlastan]

[Stan lets them explain what they need to and get it all out, and his face falls in quiet concern. He barely knows them either, but after everything that happened what is he gonna do, say no? A lot of this strikes a familiar chord in Stan, more than he'd care to admit.

So, he steps aside and gestures for Loop to follow.]

Sure, c'mon in. You don't have to sleep on the floor either; there's plenty of space here. It's safe.

[Even if they feel weird about borrowing a bed there's at least armchairs or couches they could lay on.

Once they're both inside, Stan locks the bolts and musters up a weak laugh.]

I knew it was you, y'know. Sun doesn't usually shine through the boards this late at night.

[theuniverseleads]

[They feel and look like a mess, but they simply nod in quiet acceptance when he gestures to let them in. Once they're inside... some of the anxiety melts away, at least. They hug their arms to themselves, looking around idly as he locks up the door. They're safe here. They can trust Stan. They can trust him.

They can't trust anyone else, but they don't think about that part. Don't think about it, don't think about it, don't think about it...]

It does make it difficult to be stealthy. [They huff a noise halfway between a laugh and a sigh, which is as close as they're gonna get right now. Distractions are fine. Their tree might as well be a Grove landmark...] It's a lot easier hiding during the day, anyway. A little too obvious once the stars come out.

[charlastan]

[There's a lot to look at already, even though the house is brand new. The Pines had found it half-burnt (or, well. Dipper had and then showed Stan and Ford when they got there) and have since gotten it repaired, but a lot of items from their supposed past lives remained - photographs, knick-knacks, the kind of things you would find in a well-lived in home.]

Yeah, I bet. Won't be a problem way out here though.

[If their reaction bothers him, it doesn't show. Distractions are what he would want anyway, and they're both a little too tired to put the full mask on at the moment.]

Let's see, uh. There's an armchair...Ford's probably not using his room tonight...heck honestly you could even borrow my room if you wanted? Odile kinda broke me in half and if I lay all the way down I'm gonna get stuck like that.

[It's very normal to joke about getting your ribs crushed, right? If not, too bad, Loop will have to get used to it!]

[theuniverseleads]

[Looks very lived in. Homey! They try to ignore the pinpricks of envy in their chest, in light of recent events. Don't think about it, Loop.

They're listening, but they perk up to full attention only at the last part. Ah, right. That does sound like something the Researcher would do. And it's something they can help with, something to focus on besides everything else, so...]

Sorry, I guess I could've warned you better. [but they did try to! Not a lot of time to explain her Craft to him, in the moment. They're glad he's still in one piece.] I can do a bit of Healing Craft. Hold still.

[They cup one hand as if making an invisible toast, then pour a sprinkle of Craft energy over Stan. Not the most effective heal, but it'll make the ribs a little less crushed, maybe. They pause to check their hand after casting with it, squinting slightly, but if anything is wrong they don't comment—they go back to crossing their arms loosely.]

An armchair is fine. I've slept in worse places before. [They would ask about somewhere with windows, but considering they could see how boarded up the place was from outside... yeah, no point asking. They'll have to deal with it.]

[charlastan]

[Stan does hold still (though admittedly, he's been trying to keep kind of still anyway, with the injury), but he looks up curiously at what Loop is doing with their hands. Whatever they did, it actually does make him feel better? Somehow? Stan bends in a couple different directions and hey! His range of motion is-- ow, wait, that one's still bad from sitting all day.]

Oof-- ha, back to just the regular old man pains!

[He rights himself and laughs - and he can actually laugh now, instead of having to go easy on it so he doesn't make his chest move!]

Thanks. Broken ribs are the worst, especially when ice packs don't work on you anymore.

[Does he elaborate on that? No, of course not! Why would he do that? Instead he just waves for Loop to follow him to the living room, where the chair he'd been sitting in is. It's worn out, like it was once well-loved, but Stan wouldn't know anything about that. He did add the pillow for his back though, which Loop can take or leave.]

Heh. Yeah, same here. Really makes a shitty old mattress feel like you're staying at the Ritz after a while.

[theuniverseleads]

[They don't question it, yeah. Maybe it's to do with the fire thing? They follow behind him, taking in more of the new surroundings. Cozy here, too...]

I got used to sleeping on the ground, so pretty much anything is a step up from that. [They only had a tree in stardust's loops and barely slept at all in their own... everything before that is a blur, but they don't imagine a traveller with no name or home to speak of had many options. A week in the clinic sure did feel like luxury.

They pause, considering the chair... they should probably thank him for letting them stay here, let him get back to his night, but.]

Thank you. For believing me. [it means a lot, when not even their former friends would back them up] ... I let him get away. Sorry. I... both of them deserved better than this.

[They should've avenged them. Should've taken out the fake when they had the chance.]

[October 6th] after 3000 years.......... therapy time.

[theuniverseleads]

[Well! They definitely have! A lot to unpack!! But mostly, they just feel bad and worried about freaking out at night, like what if they do something weird while half-asleep... they don't want to get kicked out of the Pines' house, but honestly, it's kind of the worst place ever for their nerves. Boarded up windows, no easy way to stand in the grass for awhile, they can go on the roof but it's no safer there than it is under a tree...

So. Therapy! Is a thing, that has been suggested to them before. They recall stardust shoving a survey in their hands in their first few weeks, which they half-heartedly half-filled and then decided never to think about again... but maybe it can still help them. Maybe they can at least be a little less broken, this way.

They can try it, just this once, and if it doesn't work then they'll never try it again. Easy.

... Anyway. They are here, in the therapy building, looking for Mizuki! Where's the Mizuki at.]

[mooninthewater]

[ Unfortunately, no one has put a bell on Mizuki since losing his voice. "Where's Mizuki?" is a significantly harder game to play now that he's lost his voice.

Fortunately, not for Loop! Mostly because the faint sounds of Pac-Man will catch their attention as Mizuki plays within one of the many piles of stuffed animals in the lobby/lounge. He does put it down when he realizes that Loop is, in fact, not lost, and probably meant to be here??

He gives a very quick sign before he has to pull his phone out. He figures it's universal enough. ] « Hi. You okay? »

[theuniverseleads]

[They have no idea what he's messing around with but yeah, they can find him. The hollow little laugh at that question probably isn't reassuring.]

Oh, absolutely not. Why else would I be here?

[Shit's fucked, Mizuki.]

[mooninthewater]

[ He just kind of flops out of the plushie pile, giving a small stretch, then waves for Loop to follow him into the office at the back. It's painted calming greens with plants filling the room and fidget toys on the desk. Something a little less medical, since Mizuki would likely go insane in that regards.

Mizuki has a seat in the chair and gestures to the couch, pulling out his phone to type. ]

You can shut the door and have a seat when you re ready. Is there something specific bothering you?

[theuniverseleads]

[Boy is there.

... but that's not what they're here for, or at least not what they think they need right now. Too much, too soon, too heavy to just dump on a stranger. They take a seat, hands clasped in their lap.]

I've been having a lot of nightmares lately. Do you know a good way to deal with those?

[mooninthewater]

It depends. How much do you sleep, and how often? Do you have caffeine regularly? Do you drink alcohol? Do you have a nighttime routine? Do you sleep in the same place every night? Do you consider your bed a "safe space" - as safe as it can be here, I suppose. What do you do before bed, usually?

[theuniverseleads]

[Ohhhh that's a lot of questions. Who knew therapy was this complicated?? They look a bit overwhelmed for a moment, like it somehow didn't occur to them that a therapist might need more than "I have nightmares sometimes" to prescribe a miracle cure for their brain problems.

They do pull themselves together, though, staring at the list on his phone with a serious expression.]

How much... I don't really keep track? I'm used to taking a lot of naps, but they're not usually very long. No caffeine or alcohol—couldn't even if I wanted to! [quickly pointing at their (lack of a) mouth] Routines... um, I'm not sure, I don't really think about that. I... usually sleep in the same place? [... their tone gives away how much they're stretching that truth. also,] I'm staying somewhere else for now, so... I guess not? It's safe. Safer. [ALSO does not sound remotely confident even if it should be true] Before bed... I don't really do anything? I just kind of zone out until I fall asleep, I guess.

[...

They feel like all those answers were kind of bad?? Getting an awful grade in therapy right now. They reluctantly hand him the phone back.]

[mooninthewater]

[ There's a knowing nod, then he reaches over to his clipboard and writes a few things down before he tries to ask Loop more questions. ]

Do you consider yourself stressed or anxious lately? Have you found your emotional state has been different than it usually is?

[October 4th] for TK

[theuniverseleads]

[It's a little past noon, and Loop has given up the chase. Could they have caught up if they hadn't wasted time with the Researcher? Maybe... but it doesn't feel like it matters. Siffrin is dead, either way. What would killing a fake do to bring him back? Why go after the Fighter, who wouldn't believe them? Why care about any of this at all?

They end up back at the inn, staring at footprints in the grass again. Eventually they start climbing, past the still-broken window and up to the roof. There is where they remain, for now, knees pulled up to their chest and staring off into the distant trees.]

[ephemeralflow]

[Timekeeper has... managed to miss this whole thing. On the plus side, she's found one half of her Sonic Embroider again, buried somewhere random at the edge of the woods. How it got like that is a mystery for another time... she's still brushing dirt and polishing smudges off it as she walks back towards the inn, and it isn't until the black, bony dog walking with her stops dead in his tracks and growls that she looks up.

...Is that window broken? Hmm. More importantly, she spies a familiar glow up on the roof. She thought Loop had a new space, now? Something feels off, and it's an easy choice to speak to the person she knows who's right here, first.

She pats Sidereal on the shoulders, then points to the ground. He sits back on his haunches, staying obediently on watch, and Timekeeper steps onto the Embroider like it's some kind of hoverboard, swooping upwards to step onto the roof and approach Loop.]

Well now, what are you doing up here of all places, looking so glum?

[theuniverseleads]

[They're looking pretty glum, yeah. Having your secret exposed along with the realization that your better-self was replaced and no one else seems to care will do that to you. They look up at her tiredly.

... hah, wouldn't it be awful if she was a doppelganger, too? That'd just be their luck. They sigh, unfolding themselves to lean back on their palms.]

If you're another copy, just get it over with and kill me. I don't care anymore. No one will bother looking for me anyway.

[So, you know! Having a normal one!]

[ephemeralflow]

[Ah, hm, yeah, that's... something. Timekeeper tilts her head questioningly, taps her chin, then sits down herself in one smooth motion, legs crossed as she sets the abused scissor half down next to her.]

I did notice a few spats with apparent doubles... [That she more or less ignored because it wasn't anyone she immediately cared about, oops!] ...So have you encountered yours, then? Hm! At the least, I do not have to worry that this is really you. I doubt a copy would offer to die, or believe that lie so deeply.

[She would look. Siffrin would look. Any of Siffrin's friends would look, she'd wager, they're all frustratingly mushy enough for that - well, if none of them are imposters, anyway.

Timekeeper isn't going to proclaim that she's not a double, because what would be the point? A double would say they're not a double. Instead, she snaps her fingers, and after a moment Continuum Cog zips up, having arrived from somewhere else in town. It clicks curiously, then in alarm as it sees Loop, hovering down to nudge at them in concern.]

As for me, would it do to have Cog vouch?

[theuniverseleads]

[Cog is just about the weirdest animal(?) to be comforted by, but they're not one to argue right now. Loop quietly gives the little guy a pat, listening in passive silence.

... she won't kill them, at least. Supposedly. Maybe that's good enough for right now. They'll get upset about it later if she ends up backstabbing them while they're already down.]

You're fine, Timekeeper.

... Siffrin is gone. So is Dipper. And Siffrin still has a copy running around, so be careful if you see him. I want to believe he's still alive somewhere, but...

[They never saw a corpse, but they don't think a copy would get so cozy in Siffrin's bedroom unless the original was taken care of. Makes them sick to think about it. They sigh.]

Dipper was found dead this morning. Stan and I, we proved that the fake Siffrin did it but the others let him go anyway... I should've known sooner, I could've had him.

[If they'd used killing intent from the start, they could've taken him out so, so much faster. Faster than anyone could've stopped them. But they fell for his lies, and almost believed him. Tragic.]

[ephemeralflow]

[The moment "So is Dipper" leaves Loop's, uh, face? Timekeeper goes completely still. Not even breathing still. Her eye is locked on them, expression quite possibly the blankest they've seen yet. She lets them finish, but all words that aren't the relevant information slip through her ears.

Siffrin's copy killed Dipper. It's still out there somewhere. Got it.

Cog looks up from leaning into Loop's pat, shudders, and hides behind Loop. Timekeeper stands again abruptly, Embroider in hand, and scans the area, her face cast in shadow from the brim of her hat.]

Which direction.

[It's a demand, not a question. Her lips still curl, but it looks more like a snarl than a smile now. (She wants to rip out the voice in her head telling her not to care, that this timeline doesn't have to be real, that she can just wind it back. She saw someone try that here once. She's tried enough herself to know it won't work.)]

[theuniverseleads]

[It's a pretty unnerving expression. They stare at her, hand still on Cog, and find that it's weirdly... reassuring? If looks could kill that fake would be dead in the woods already. They meet her gaze, expression softly touched.

... well, until they have to break the bad news. Their face falls again, coloured with shame.]

I don't know. I... lost track of them pretty quickly. [ah. they should explain more, so she doesn't try to kill—] The Fighter is with the copy. I didn't see them from this side, so they must've gone the other way somewhere. I'm not sure where.

[Sorry is implied. They're feeling pretty useless today, after everything that went down.]

[ephemeralflow]

[And unfortunately, Timekeeper is not much good at comforting. Especially not when she's this incensed. She stalks over to the edge of the roof and whistles sharply - Sidereal stands immediately, giving a single bark. Timekeeper glances back towards Loop.]

If the Fighter gets in the way, I won't hesitate.

[That's all she has to say before she hops off the roof and lands easily on the grass. She waves for the dog to follow, and enters the inn with him trotting after her.

She's headed for Siffrin's room. There's more than one way to sniff out a rat, and if the copies are good enough that they even threw Loop off for a bit, surely the scent is similar enough.]