Spam Likely — Netbook

[unheiring]

[One morning, after everyone has been bone-raptured out of the grove, a series of messages begin appearing both on cellphones and netbooks alike. They’re… ingredience? Weird.]


Love Potion Cocktail
5 fresh raspberries
1 ½ ounces vodka
1 ½ ounces Chambord, raspberry liqueur
4 ounces ginger beer
dry ice, optional

The Nomad Special
Whiskey
Greasy Nut

Galaxy Lemonade
3 Ice Cubes Of Blue Matcha Powder
1 Cup Water
½ Cup Vodka
72 Ounces lemonade

The Blood Razor
Red Wine
Brandy
Razor Blade
Cherry Soda

Il Rigeneratore
1 Egg Yolk
Half a Glass of Asti Spumante
3 Roasted Walnuts
3 Teaspoons Sugar
1 Banana

Champagne Jelly Shots with Pomegranate Bursting Boba
2 cups Champagne or sparkling wine
1/3 cup 65g granulated sugar
1 packet .25 oz. powdered gelatin
1 container 15.8 oz. pomegranate bursting boba
1/3 cup heavy whipping cream
2 tablespoons white nonpareils
Gold edible stars
18 sprigs of rosemary about 1 ½ stems

[The spam continues on like this for some time. When the messages do finally stop, it lasts for about three minutes before one final note comes through.]

… Sorry. No other option but to send through these strange devices.

Comments

[ichoosefight]

please tell me you've never served me anything with egg in it

[unheiring]

I have not.

... Yet.

[ichoosefight]

if I catch you messing with eggs behind the bar I'm gonna throw one at you >:(

[unheiring]

I will have you know that several renowned drinks do contain egg. I will not foist one upon you, but do not be so quick to knock the process overall.

[ichoosefight]

yeah but I had already tried eggnog before I thought about the name. it's too late for other drinks now. I know the truth

[shineprism]

These sound really good!

[unheiring]

Some better than others.

Let me know which you most prefer and I will make it back at the Watchtower.

[shineprism]

The Love Potion Cocktail sounds so nice, and the Galaxy Lemonade too.

[unheiring]

Good to know. I'll be sure to add them to the menu. And make sure our new bartender is ready to make it for you.

[cryopathy]

I would like the Potion Cocktail, please. Hold the Love.

P.S. Luca, darling, birdbrain, cherished and beloved brother, please don't eat razor blades.

[unheiring]

It is removed before serving.

... You can have the cocktail though. After you learn to make it. We are updating our options at the bar.

[cryopathy]

What in the world is the point? You might as well simply serve the drink in a copper goblet. It would impart the same flavor.

UGH. Lucaaaaa! These are so complicated.

[unheiring]

The visuals, I suppose? Who can say.

And? Where is your sense of... whimsy?

[lupusxylem]

the nomad sounds like its both targeted and would kill me

so when are you gonna start sellin it

[unheiring]

When someone brings me the shells to make it.
Are you offering?

[lupusxylem]

love to but i aint exactly in the grove right now for you to collect

do you do IOUs?

[unheiring]

I take it you are in Neo-Eden, then?
Find the club Arcadia. I can tend to you there.

[eidxiety]

Is it a real love potion :O

[unheiring]

Only one way to find out ;)

[eidxiety]

Hmmmmm... doesn't that mean you're going to test it on someone?

[unheiring]

Maybe. Maybe not. Are you volunteering?

[chickenchoicejudy]

Dude these sound SO good!

Especially Galaxy Lemonade, I didn't even know you could get matcha in blue?? And the jelly shots?? And a LOVE POTION that tastes like RASPBERRIES???

Are these in Neo Eden? Is this what future cocktails are like???

[unheiring]

In Neo Eden for now. But I am working on recreating them back at The Watchtower. It would be a shame to let such vibrant drinks go by the wayside, wouldn't you say?

[chickenchoicejudy]

Totally! I mean the tavern vibe is really cool too, but I'm NEVER going to say no to having drinks with edible stars on them.

[unheiring]

I am no old codger. I am not opposed to growing with the times.

... and the stars are nice. Perhaps if I added some edible glitter as well?