sticksandbones

🤡

Who: Allen + You!
What: Holy clown boy coming to a Grove near you!
When: Beginning of March
Where: ??? Around
Warnings: None yet, will be in headers as the pop up.

I. I've tasted all your sin (Forest entrance)

[ There is, perhaps, not a single person who would say arriving in the Grove isn't jarring. Some woke up here from their own slumber back home, and that is perhaps the smoothest transition you can get, even even that has yet to be graceful. For Allen, one moment he's holding the hand of his friend, trying to wake him up from what he could only assume was a horrific coma, and then next he's... here. His hand clasps in on itself, and he's suddenly looking around in a panic. He knew that the place he'd ended up may very well kick him out of his consciousness. May lend just the right amount of strength for Nea to pull him out of the "driver's seat", so to speak, but... is that what's happening now? Now, when he was so close to saving his friend?

No.

No, no, no.

The panic sets in as he darts from out of the trees, attempting to look for something, anything that might help him figure out how to get back. It's once he gets into the Grove proper that his eye activates. He has his own questions about that - if he's not in control, where is that coming from? What would his eye see... in his own head? Before he can ponder it for too long, he at least gets one of his answers. What does his eye see? Well.

Death.

It's the first time Allen's seeing souls not attached to something else, but Allen doesn't have time to process that part. Rather, he is trying to remember how to breathe again, because as of now, seeing the horrible visions in front of him - death of his friends, of those he loves, of a fire that isn't really there - all has the air he's trying to get out caught in his throat. It's only once his eye deactivates, the sclera turning from black to white and the red of his eye back to a silvery gray, does he finally have some kind of reprieve from the overwhelm. It's not much. The panic has only gotten worse, after all.

He falls to his knees, gasping for air as if he'd been held underwater for too long. ]

II. You've lost your appetite (for sacrifice) (Timcanpy, the Inn)

[ Timcanpy is a little golden golem. He is here! He isn't sure why he's here, but he is! How exciting! He's gonna...! He's...!!!

...

Where is this!!!!!!!!!! He is going to float out of the inn room he Spawned(tm) in and??? chew on the first person he sees. Hello. ]

III. How can we terminate this parasite (Around the Grove)

[ Fortunately, although the panic attack hits Allen like a train, the fact that he's so fucking hungry does as well. Which means... this is definitely his body. He's not stuck in his head. That's?? Good. Probably. Well, it's not good that he doesn't know where he is, but it's good he's still Him. Does this make sense? No. It doesn't. Fuck, he's SO hungry-

He will very hastily try to find the first person he can and catch their attention with a friendly wave of his normal-looking hand, and in a thick, British accent: ] Cheers! Uh, I have a lot of questions, but... most important, do you know where a bloke might find some food? Preferably, a lot of it?

...

Oh, also, what is that? [ He's, uh, pointing at Moder. ]

IV. If you keep digging up the Host? (Wildcard)
HMU if you wanna do something else pls I have such a strong muse for my baby boy I'm gonna be SO annoying-

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Then don't be loud... idiot. [ He mutters back, kissing him more and more. They're short and sweet, but they are abundant, like he's trying to fit in as many kisses into a few seconds that he was unable to indulge in for the past few days.

Kisskisskisskisskisskiss...

At least until he can no longer stand on his tiptoes. Which doesn't take long. God, Kanda, why are you so TALL? He drops after around a minute. ]

Besides, why the fuck are you complaining? I felt like I was gonna die if I didn't get at least one kiss. You telling me you weren't??? 'Cause I'll just stop kissing you and wither away if that's the case.

[ ...

Leans up for just one more kiss. Okay he's good- ]

Here, this [ Looks at the bottle, ] Solar Baby will protect your skin from the sun. Put it on after you change.

Also I need you to help me put some on my back. I wasn't gonna make Link do it.

M'not bein' loud...

[You guys are super gross just by the way. But it isn't like Kanda is much better, for as much as he's always spitting fire. He would not be gripping Allen with that much desperation if he was better and aware of himself and all that. So yeah, they're going to greedily steal kisses from each other while Link is oblivious outside, and then they'll part long enough for Kanda to remember he was here to change and like

not have a brain because when does he ever

and just wholesale take his shirt off right there.

Babe we are begging for some awareness.]

Who the fuck is Solar— oh. [The sunscreen brand. Okay.] Got it, give me a sec.

[Are you ever just too used to changing in a room with other men so much you don't even think about just taking your goddamn pants off]

[While those two are barely functioning gays inside, Link is looking at the seashells on the shore. These are nothing like the ones at the river...holy shit. Well, since Kanda already solved their food problem, he's just going to putter around out here and collect shells until the boys come back (ya'll can skip Link until you come back outside)]

[

Oh.

Yeah, okay, that's fine. Kanda's used to the Order! Where they share changing rooms! And shared baths! And there's a bunch of other shared spaces! This makes sense! This is fine! This is cool!

Allen should look away politely.

He does not. ]

So, the fucking lobsters, [Kanda has no idea he's killing Allen over here, he's just talking at him while he changes and fixes his hair,] one of them had a tiny hat on. I'm guessing there's some kind of hierarchy there. The important part is that they're goddamn hostile, but they didn't follow me after I left the cove. Also, they walk on their hind legs.

[Bare-assed leaning over to reach in his bag. He needs a sturdier hair tie than this one, this one is Not for swimming.]

I found a real tuna in the ocean when I was spearfishing, [hair tie found, time to put trunks on,] but Tim ate it, and I have no idea if they're rare or if that one was the last of its kind. There are normal fish in the river, so maybe that one fell down the waterfall and was fated to be Tim's lunch, I'unno.

[With his trunks on, he's putting his hair up in a man-bun, like a fruit.]

I didn't look into much else because I was too busy trying to figure out if non-cake fish exi— why are you looking at me like that.

[ Allen might regret not looking away later, but right now he sure the fuck does not. Hi, Kanda, your ass is fucking beautiful??? He has no idea what he'd do if he turned around on a whim. Maybe blow up? He might have blown up. Ah. Allen looks up at Kanda, his face beet fucking red.

Fuck.

He covers his face and slumps against the seat. ]

...Y...You undressed right there...

And you're so goddamn attractive, fuck. I couldn't help it, I'm sorry, fuckin' shit...

[Points for nice ass acquired?? He has no idea what he does to men truly. Link you're missing it sweetie you're missing them gay up the place—]

... [Slowly getting redder. Right. Okay.] R... right. I forgot. Not that you were there, just that... things are different.

[you guys.]

...are you going to explode if I help you with that lotion, or.

N-no! I'll be fine! We've done this before, it's not that different. [ Yes it is. ] I'm just being stupid. [ It's normal to think your boyfriend is attractive. ] Sorry. Again. I should have looked away, that was rude.

[ Just don't be attractive, Kanda, ez pz. Though, with how many compliments the man gets whenever he exists around people, that's truly not possible for him. Allen isn't, so he's winning there!!

He shifts himself in the chair so that his back is visible. ]

Just hurry up, stupid.

It's fine, Beansprout, calm down.

[Wow... him boyfriend thinks he's hot... impressive he truly never thought he'd get this far ever.

Anyway, he's not expecting the sunscreen that he's still mentally calling lotion (it's kind of similar) to be this fucking thick. Why is it THICK. Is that to prevent the s u n from getting in? What the hell man. In any case, rubbing down Allen's back is easy, though he finds himself touching the long scar on his torso eventually, a bit melancholy.

The wound from Mugen, too, gets similar treatment. This one lingers. He's done with the lotion by this point, so this really is just touching to touch.]

...these don't hurt, do they?

[ I mean, calling it "sun lotion" isn't too far off from what it is, so...

Allen does shiver a little, from both the lotion being cold and also just from having Kanda's hands on his back. It's nice, in its own way. If he were feeling slightly more mischievous, he might've asked Kanda for a massage, but... he does feel Kanda's hesitation. Those ugly scars, reminders of the stupid things Allen has done... he's well aware his body is more a warning sign of what not to do at this point. Give it a few more years and maybe he'll have even more of these.

He does lean back a little, just enough so he can twist his head back and smile at Kanda. ] Only when Nea tried to take hold. So not in a while.

It isn't your fault, Kanda. You have to stop blaming yourself for this.

I'll do that when I'm dead.

[Therapy. Go to therapy. He's going to rub the scar for a bit longer than necessary before he turns to do his own sunscreen next.]

You know I'll always regret that entire battle. It's no use telling me to shelve it.

Mmh… [ Allen does, too. If Allen weren’t around, after all, the Noah wouldn’t have tortured Alma and Kanda so. After all, of course in the moment, Kanda would blame Allen. Of course in the moment, Kanda would call Allen a traitorous Noah and tell him this was his fault. Of course he would. And it’s correct to do so. Allen didn’t blame him even slightly, no matter how much it hurt to hear him say it.

Regardless, Allen stands spinning around the chair and stealing a bit of the sunscreen so he can get Kanda’s back as well. ]

And you know I’m stubborn as sin. I’ll remind you every bloody day until I get it through that thick skull of yours if I have to. [ He’s going to roughly rub the sunscreen against Kanda as if annunciating each syllable with every wipe of his hand. ] None! Of! That! Was! Yooooooooooooour! Fault!

[ Pat Pat Pat. ]

Got it now???? If you don’t blame the Noah for it, how are we sloppy supposed to hold them accountable??

Edited 2026-03-19 11:25 (UTC)

[This dork...

As Allen is finishing up helping, Kanda twists around and kisses him on the corner of the mouth.]

Whatever you say.

[He's getting up now.]

Let's get going. We don't want to leave the dog outside by himself for too long.

[ He gives a little content hum at a kiss, seemingly happy with that, for now. Though, yes, he will be bothering Kanda more about this later— ] Yes, yes, I’m coming.

…Oh! Hey, Kanda. Li… said he doesn’t know how to swim. I’m gonna teach him, okay? Could you do me a favor and not tease him for it?

They aren't teaching CROWs how to avoid drowning anymore? Good to know.

[Kanda.]

I solemnly swear not to be a jackass about that specifically.

[ Nudges Kanda. ] Twat.

[ He sighs a little, but heads back outside after grabbing two towels (Kanda can grab his own). He waves out to Link. ]

Oi! You ready, Li??

[When Link hears Allen calling for him in the distance, he gets up from where he'd been squatting next to the water's edge with Tim. He has so many shells...just shells filling both of his hands, which he holds out when the two approach.]

Apologies. I got distracted with these. They must be worth a lot back in the Grove.

[Kanda whistles.]

Probably.

[They're Just Shells but as far as Kanda's aware the autism creature that runs the tailor shop really likes shiny shells. He knows of no other locations where the shells are given worth like coins are; when he went to that Arabic place for lunch he just paid with what the fuck ever.

Anyway, he's setting his towel down on one of the chairs at the seaside and re-adjusting his hair before climbing into the water proper in Not Jeans this time. Bye he's joining the sharks.]

Jeez, Li, you don’t have to work now, you know. [ Arguably, collecting shells can be relaxing, but considering they are a currency… it’s work as far as Allen’s concerned. He at least opens one of the towels to gather all the shells up to keep them in one place, and then follows suit in leaving them on the chair.

He walks to the edge of the water after, plopping his feet in and sticking both his arms out as he takes wide steps through the water. Plop plop. What a weirdo. Only after doing this for a moment does he drop one arm and offer the other out to Link. ]

Okay! Come, come, it’s not that cold. And the sand’s real soft, too, so this should be easy! Just hold onto my hand!

[Ah, right...the Dreaded Sea.

Link pauses to kindof look over to where Kanda is, seeing that he's distracted by his own swimming endeavors, hoping he won't...really be paying them too much attention. At least not enough to notice that Link is turning a little pale as Allen gestures for him to come closer into the deeper water.

Swallowing, he pads over into the water's edge, though he doesn't immediately plop into the deeper part like Allen does. There's a moment of hesitation before he reaches out and takes his hand, solely as a lifeline so he doesn't get swept off to sea.]

Alright...I'm. I'm here.

Edited 2026-03-19 18:48 (UTC)

[Kanda has been baby leashed by Allen he's FINE. He's behaving! He's swimming out near a collection of rocks that are blessedly lacking in sirens, sticking close by to hear and pay attention in case Link starts to die or whatever or something attacks them, but also curious because he wants to See.

As he's swimming over there something that smells distinctly like watermelon brushes over his leg, and he barely manages to look down and blurt out a "hello" before a watermelon whale shark surfaces and Looks at him.

Christ.]

Can I help you.

[The whale shark looks at him like OwO]

[ Kanda, you might be a Disney princess.

Allen wants to gawk at creatures, but he isn’t taking his eyes off Link for now. He is simply trying to make sure the poor guy doesn’t end up talking himself out of it, either. He just smiles, watching Tim land directly on Link’s head. Helping! ]

And me too! I won’t let go, you’re fine. We’re not even waist deep yet. And, fortunately, it’s not hard to stay afloat! Especially in salt water. Dunno why, but it’s easier~

Yes, but. No matter how well you float…I’ve read about currents that can sweep you out to sea with more force than you’re able to fight against. If you’re caught in one you could get pulled out so far you don’t have the energy or strength to swim back to shore. People drown shortly after that once they’ve exhausted all of their energy treading water, their bodies bleached by the sun…

[Link are you good-]

[It's because he's the "animals are better than people" sort and the animals are making it obvious that his aura is sour.

Anyway, he's hearing Link saying this and rolling his eyes like... buddy. Dude. He told Allen he wouldn't be mean, so he's not going to be mean, but it requires some really hard chewing on his tongue for a minute while he looks for his Nice Words.]

Those currents are further out than the shore. And I think there's a giant sea serpent named Hoshibi out here that would stop us from drowning anyway. [Mizuki said something like that.]

That’s like when you’re out in the parts of the ocean that aren’t by the shore! Like… deep out there! We’re not going that far, and the tides aren’t gonna pull you out that far, either.

Besides, the ocean can’t beat the energy out of me! I’d win! And I’d just come and rescue you!!! [ Bold words for someone who’s currently wading out deeper into the water. But, yes, he doesn’t intend to go too deep into the ocean. ]

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