sticksandbones

🤡

Who: Allen + You!
What: Holy clown boy coming to a Grove near you!
When: Beginning of March
Where: ??? Around
Warnings: None yet, will be in headers as the pop up.

I. I've tasted all your sin (Forest entrance)

[ There is, perhaps, not a single person who would say arriving in the Grove isn't jarring. Some woke up here from their own slumber back home, and that is perhaps the smoothest transition you can get, even even that has yet to be graceful. For Allen, one moment he's holding the hand of his friend, trying to wake him up from what he could only assume was a horrific coma, and then next he's... here. His hand clasps in on itself, and he's suddenly looking around in a panic. He knew that the place he'd ended up may very well kick him out of his consciousness. May lend just the right amount of strength for Nea to pull him out of the "driver's seat", so to speak, but... is that what's happening now? Now, when he was so close to saving his friend?

No.

No, no, no.

The panic sets in as he darts from out of the trees, attempting to look for something, anything that might help him figure out how to get back. It's once he gets into the Grove proper that his eye activates. He has his own questions about that - if he's not in control, where is that coming from? What would his eye see... in his own head? Before he can ponder it for too long, he at least gets one of his answers. What does his eye see? Well.

Death.

It's the first time Allen's seeing souls not attached to something else, but Allen doesn't have time to process that part. Rather, he is trying to remember how to breathe again, because as of now, seeing the horrible visions in front of him - death of his friends, of those he loves, of a fire that isn't really there - all has the air he's trying to get out caught in his throat. It's only once his eye deactivates, the sclera turning from black to white and the red of his eye back to a silvery gray, does he finally have some kind of reprieve from the overwhelm. It's not much. The panic has only gotten worse, after all.

He falls to his knees, gasping for air as if he'd been held underwater for too long. ]

II. You've lost your appetite (for sacrifice) (Timcanpy, the Inn)

[ Timcanpy is a little golden golem. He is here! He isn't sure why he's here, but he is! How exciting! He's gonna...! He's...!!!

...

Where is this!!!!!!!!!! He is going to float out of the inn room he Spawned(tm) in and??? chew on the first person he sees. Hello. ]

III. How can we terminate this parasite (Around the Grove)

[ Fortunately, although the panic attack hits Allen like a train, the fact that he's so fucking hungry does as well. Which means... this is definitely his body. He's not stuck in his head. That's?? Good. Probably. Well, it's not good that he doesn't know where he is, but it's good he's still Him. Does this make sense? No. It doesn't. Fuck, he's SO hungry-

He will very hastily try to find the first person he can and catch their attention with a friendly wave of his normal-looking hand, and in a thick, British accent: ] Cheers! Uh, I have a lot of questions, but... most important, do you know where a bloke might find some food? Preferably, a lot of it?

...

Oh, also, what is that? [ He's, uh, pointing at Moder. ]

IV. If you keep digging up the Host? (Wildcard)
HMU if you wanna do something else pls I have such a strong muse for my baby boy I'm gonna be SO annoying-

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

I think Tim left to watch him. He'll be okay! [ Except that one time Kanda and Tim were left alone. Haha. Allen doesn't think like that, though-

Anyway, he'll lead the way back outside, then, to hunt down a sword boy. Where are you, Kanda, does Allen have to be worried- ]

[Yeah y'all left him alone for an hour or so and he's gotten up to some stuff. Notably the stuff that we've already touched on but that was the stuff. He's coming back up the beach to see if there's any chance they can put these shellfish (several dead lobsters too) away in the fridge or something when he spots the boys in their swimwear.

Kanda is being followed by an entourage of sea monkeys holding shrimps and clams and oysters, Tim with like three lobsters in his mouth, and is currently holding a sharp stick with several speared Weird Fish on them. He's drenched. War was fought and won (the war did not last very long the lobsters realised they were at a disadvantage and retreated). The sea monkeys are making noises and he has no idea what they're saying, but it's something like THE MESSENGER OF GOD HAS WON THE DAY! HAIL! HAIL! HAIL!]

...I found dinner.

[Boy you sure fucking did.]

...

.....what...happened?

H...

...

Kanda, how th'fuck?

Why are you both looking at me like that?

[The sea monkeys proudly show the other boys the haul of seafood. They are trying their best.]

I explored a little bit of that cave and out into the cove back there before getting accosted by several more dessert-shaped fish, then went into the ocean to see if there were any real fish. I found these. [Shakes spear.] Tim seemed to agree that they're edible. While I was doing that, these little things that are following me started gathering shellfish on my behalf, and then we got into a turf war with the lobster mafia after they tried to steal the haul from these guys. Now they're followin' me and I can't get rid of them.

I was about to put all this in the ice box until we could figure out how to fillet some of these, and if you weren't going to let me back in, I would've grabbed another cabana. That's what you missed.

You're welcome, by the way, for my efforts getting us dinner.

Er. I see...

[Okay note to self, leave Kanda alone and he WILL get himself into situations.]

Well, thank you for going to the trouble. If you and Allen can get us a fire going, I can put the excess in the icebox and pull out what we need for right now.

THE MOB IS REAL?!

Sure, but you're dressed for swimming— yes the mob is real— it's the middle of the goddamn afternoon, we don't have to worry about dinner yet, give me a few minutes to change and put everything away.

[The sea monkeys wiggle and follow after Kanda up the shore. Yayyyy task! This is what they're doing with their free will. Kanda has to help them put the haul in the ice box (which is full now) (but yay seafood spread) before they all trundle off. Surely they will do something and not get into So much trouble after they leave. Surely the turf war was a lie.

In any case, he's going back inside, speak now or forever hold your peace.]

[Well...the mob is, in fact, real. It would seem.

Link watches as the sea monkeys that are now apparently in Kanda's employ march after him as they put their catch away and he starts to disappear inside, at which point Link is going to exchange a look with Allen, then kindof gesture to the sunscreen like-!!

Sunscreen.]

[ Somewhere, Mizuki is proud of his little guys. Bless them. They're doing so well. When Mizuki quest two rolls around he's going to make sand fortresses for them-

He nods at Link and gives him a little pat on his shoulder. ]

I'll be right back! Can you make sure Tim doesn't eat anything out here? [ Kanda's turn to be briefly accosted before he drags Link out into the ocean.

He doesn't stop Kanda from going inside. He just follows him. The moment they're inside, though, he's shutting the door and grabbing Kanda's hand so he can pull him back and pin him to said door.

Hi.

Get kissed, idiot. He hasn't been able to do this for three whole days. He's surely going to wither away at this rate. ]

[Whoa hi hello thank god the sea monkeys left and that he's no longer holding a pointy stick that smells like fish guts—

Obviously Kanda is not expecting to be pinned by the door (judging by the noise he makes) but he's also not complaining about it so like... you know, watch out Link they're putting gay people aura in the fucking cabana.]

Idiot, [he mutters between kisses with his hands on Allen's waist, because of course that's where they went first,] the window's open...

[Link voice what dey doin over der]

[Link is...unaware that they are committing sins of homosexuality behind the cabin door because he's too busy checking up on Tim because Allen asked him to. And also because Tim is a little guy and he loves him.

He crouches down next to where Tim ended up, mouth full of lobsters as it is. Typically it's been known historically as a peasant food, but thanks to the war, they've become a lot more scarce and expensive...it's not common to see this many in one place.]

We're going to have to make something nice with these.

Then don't be loud... idiot. [ He mutters back, kissing him more and more. They're short and sweet, but they are abundant, like he's trying to fit in as many kisses into a few seconds that he was unable to indulge in for the past few days.

Kisskisskisskisskisskiss...

At least until he can no longer stand on his tiptoes. Which doesn't take long. God, Kanda, why are you so TALL? He drops after around a minute. ]

Besides, why the fuck are you complaining? I felt like I was gonna die if I didn't get at least one kiss. You telling me you weren't??? 'Cause I'll just stop kissing you and wither away if that's the case.

[ ...

Leans up for just one more kiss. Okay he's good- ]

Here, this [ Looks at the bottle, ] Solar Baby will protect your skin from the sun. Put it on after you change.

Also I need you to help me put some on my back. I wasn't gonna make Link do it.

M'not bein' loud...

[You guys are super gross just by the way. But it isn't like Kanda is much better, for as much as he's always spitting fire. He would not be gripping Allen with that much desperation if he was better and aware of himself and all that. So yeah, they're going to greedily steal kisses from each other while Link is oblivious outside, and then they'll part long enough for Kanda to remember he was here to change and like

not have a brain because when does he ever

and just wholesale take his shirt off right there.

Babe we are begging for some awareness.]

Who the fuck is Solar— oh. [The sunscreen brand. Okay.] Got it, give me a sec.

[Are you ever just too used to changing in a room with other men so much you don't even think about just taking your goddamn pants off]

[While those two are barely functioning gays inside, Link is looking at the seashells on the shore. These are nothing like the ones at the river...holy shit. Well, since Kanda already solved their food problem, he's just going to putter around out here and collect shells until the boys come back (ya'll can skip Link until you come back outside)]

[

Oh.

Yeah, okay, that's fine. Kanda's used to the Order! Where they share changing rooms! And shared baths! And there's a bunch of other shared spaces! This makes sense! This is fine! This is cool!

Allen should look away politely.

He does not. ]

So, the fucking lobsters, [Kanda has no idea he's killing Allen over here, he's just talking at him while he changes and fixes his hair,] one of them had a tiny hat on. I'm guessing there's some kind of hierarchy there. The important part is that they're goddamn hostile, but they didn't follow me after I left the cove. Also, they walk on their hind legs.

[Bare-assed leaning over to reach in his bag. He needs a sturdier hair tie than this one, this one is Not for swimming.]

I found a real tuna in the ocean when I was spearfishing, [hair tie found, time to put trunks on,] but Tim ate it, and I have no idea if they're rare or if that one was the last of its kind. There are normal fish in the river, so maybe that one fell down the waterfall and was fated to be Tim's lunch, I'unno.

[With his trunks on, he's putting his hair up in a man-bun, like a fruit.]

I didn't look into much else because I was too busy trying to figure out if non-cake fish exi— why are you looking at me like that.

[ Allen might regret not looking away later, but right now he sure the fuck does not. Hi, Kanda, your ass is fucking beautiful??? He has no idea what he'd do if he turned around on a whim. Maybe blow up? He might have blown up. Ah. Allen looks up at Kanda, his face beet fucking red.

Fuck.

He covers his face and slumps against the seat. ]

...Y...You undressed right there...

And you're so goddamn attractive, fuck. I couldn't help it, I'm sorry, fuckin' shit...

[Points for nice ass acquired?? He has no idea what he does to men truly. Link you're missing it sweetie you're missing them gay up the place—]

... [Slowly getting redder. Right. Okay.] R... right. I forgot. Not that you were there, just that... things are different.

[you guys.]

...are you going to explode if I help you with that lotion, or.

N-no! I'll be fine! We've done this before, it's not that different. [ Yes it is. ] I'm just being stupid. [ It's normal to think your boyfriend is attractive. ] Sorry. Again. I should have looked away, that was rude.

[ Just don't be attractive, Kanda, ez pz. Though, with how many compliments the man gets whenever he exists around people, that's truly not possible for him. Allen isn't, so he's winning there!!

He shifts himself in the chair so that his back is visible. ]

Just hurry up, stupid.

It's fine, Beansprout, calm down.

[Wow... him boyfriend thinks he's hot... impressive he truly never thought he'd get this far ever.

Anyway, he's not expecting the sunscreen that he's still mentally calling lotion (it's kind of similar) to be this fucking thick. Why is it THICK. Is that to prevent the s u n from getting in? What the hell man. In any case, rubbing down Allen's back is easy, though he finds himself touching the long scar on his torso eventually, a bit melancholy.

The wound from Mugen, too, gets similar treatment. This one lingers. He's done with the lotion by this point, so this really is just touching to touch.]

...these don't hurt, do they?

[ I mean, calling it "sun lotion" isn't too far off from what it is, so...

Allen does shiver a little, from both the lotion being cold and also just from having Kanda's hands on his back. It's nice, in its own way. If he were feeling slightly more mischievous, he might've asked Kanda for a massage, but... he does feel Kanda's hesitation. Those ugly scars, reminders of the stupid things Allen has done... he's well aware his body is more a warning sign of what not to do at this point. Give it a few more years and maybe he'll have even more of these.

He does lean back a little, just enough so he can twist his head back and smile at Kanda. ] Only when Nea tried to take hold. So not in a while.

It isn't your fault, Kanda. You have to stop blaming yourself for this.

I'll do that when I'm dead.

[Therapy. Go to therapy. He's going to rub the scar for a bit longer than necessary before he turns to do his own sunscreen next.]

You know I'll always regret that entire battle. It's no use telling me to shelve it.

Mmh… [ Allen does, too. If Allen weren’t around, after all, the Noah wouldn’t have tortured Alma and Kanda so. After all, of course in the moment, Kanda would blame Allen. Of course in the moment, Kanda would call Allen a traitorous Noah and tell him this was his fault. Of course he would. And it’s correct to do so. Allen didn’t blame him even slightly, no matter how much it hurt to hear him say it.

Regardless, Allen stands spinning around the chair and stealing a bit of the sunscreen so he can get Kanda’s back as well. ]

And you know I’m stubborn as sin. I’ll remind you every bloody day until I get it through that thick skull of yours if I have to. [ He’s going to roughly rub the sunscreen against Kanda as if annunciating each syllable with every wipe of his hand. ] None! Of! That! Was! Yooooooooooooour! Fault!

[ Pat Pat Pat. ]

Got it now???? If you don’t blame the Noah for it, how are we sloppy supposed to hold them accountable??

Edited 2026-03-19 11:25 (UTC)

[This dork...

As Allen is finishing up helping, Kanda twists around and kisses him on the corner of the mouth.]

Whatever you say.

[He's getting up now.]

Let's get going. We don't want to leave the dog outside by himself for too long.

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